I lay here waiting, it isn't the first time.
You come in, shirt off already
I guess I am ready
I am supposed to be
You smile at my body
And my lips curve upward
Happy you see something you like
I am fifteen.
I must have something you like
I take off my clothes
because of the look in your eyes
A part of me loves that stare
Your body presses on mine
A part of me loves your skin
Nothing has really happened yet
I think I am okay
And I love being loved
Held for a moment,
the way it is supposed to be.
But then you push open my legs
And I feel less.
You move in
and out
and in
and out
I don't know what is happening
I mean I know what you are doing
But I don't understand me
where I am
somewhere else
Not here
My skin feels removed from me
I don't come
but you do
And I let it happen
I do
Every time
You wipe up and zip up your pants
fling your backpack on the bed
Not like you will do homework
But it seems the thing to do
You turn on music
And I lay there
The music traces my heart
More than you ever did
I cry inside but you can't see a thing
I may hear about it tomorrow.
She was so good.
She puts out
She
She
She
She is me
I must be easy
A tear sneaks out
Rolls down my cheek and
onto my chest as I sit up.
I wipe it away.
It's my fault
This is my doing
I did this to myself
And I will do it again.
I zip up my pants
And disappear
These words and images are the property of the poet, Sharon Frances.
Do not use in part or whole without permission.
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